My daughters have headed back to school, which means, inevitably, that I, too, am headed back to teaching for another year. This year, however, I hope to stick to teaching only two classes per quarter, and pay attention to things that matter most to me: my girls, my marriage, my writing life, my parents. We'll see if I can persevere in the face of my husband's fears about money, not to mention my college's needs. Here's what I want to keep in mind:
"I pay a steep price when I live a divided life--feeling fraudulent, anxious about being found out, and depressed by the fact that I am denying my own selfhood. The people around me pay a price as well, for now they walk on ground made unstable by my dividedness. How can I affirm another's identity when I deny my own? How can I trust another's integrity when I defy my own? A fault line runs down the middle of my life, and whenever it cracks open--divorcing my words and actions from the truth I hold within--things around me get shaky and start to fall apart." -Parker Palmer, A Hidden Wholeness
"I pay a steep price when I live a divided life--feeling fraudulent, anxious about being found out, and depressed by the fact that I am denying my own selfhood. The people around me pay a price as well, for now they walk on ground made unstable by my dividedness. How can I affirm another's identity when I deny my own? How can I trust another's integrity when I defy my own? A fault line runs down the middle of my life, and whenever it cracks open--divorcing my words and actions from the truth I hold within--things around me get shaky and start to fall apart." -Parker Palmer, A Hidden Wholeness
I'm 65 and feel the same even though my children are grown and I don't work, at least I don't get paid, I feel my life is divided. My mother at 94 consumes my time and mind - she is perfectly charming but I am divided.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your honesty and Parker Palmer too. Love, the Froglady